This is not new, managing emotions is of primary importance for the protection of oneself and personal relationships. Not only because negative emotions risk causing unpleasant situations, but precisely because in the throes of emotions one inevitably suffers. In this article I leave you some simple tips that can help you manage emotions better.
You will surely have happened to have bad news or to witness an unpleasant event. What usually happens is that once the "external stimulating agent" arrives, your reaction is in a rush even before you have fully understood the dynamics or what the "negative" happening might actually entail.
In this case I intend not to futurize in the sense of not creating "scared" versions of yourself thinking about the future. In fact in most cases we tend to have a reaction based on a related fear of something that might happen, but in most cases these are things that will never happen. But the mind simply "lies" by superimposing a fear on a certain context.
I see it happening all the time on jealousies, anxieties etc ...
Also in this case we have a "time" factor involved in the management of our emotions, in fact many times we carry with us "inner ballast" which tend to make our existence rather heavy in certain contexts. We are not always used to taking things calmly and responding carefully, but we generally respond or react with the experiences we carry on.
This can be a good thing if, for example, we have learned something from the past that can serve us in the present, but it can be highly counterproductive if the load we carry is associated with a negative experience. In fact, it is not uncommon to see something happen and think (when this happens I get anxiety).
A great way to stop being anchored in the past is to simply keep attention towards our reactions, so as to understand that there is something to be solved, because many times we do not realize it. Once identified, it will be much easier to understand the reasons for this weight and to understand what reactions are associated with it.
One of the most frequent problems that we bring from the past are derived from internal wounds, here you find a previously written article on forgiveness . It may seem strange to you but it is a very powerful tool to get rid of the negative emotions of the past and manage better.
Also remember, if something from the past upsets you, you become aware that it is past and things are not always the same so it is not certain that they will recap the same things over and over again. If this happens then it is a sign that we have something profound to work on and improve on.
Given the two previous points to better manage some emotions, this recommendation could not be missed. Staying in the present and stop traveling with the mind is quite a difficult undertaking at the beginning, which then gradually becomes easier and easier to complete as you get used to it.
The advantages of staying in the present are innumerable but in this context the amazing thing is that it completely cancels the "mental travel" and allows us to focus better in a positive way on what is happening, allowing us to manage our emotions better.
We had also previously written an article on anger management , I recommend it as it is very common that the emotion to be managed is precisely that.
Many times we create "ideological altars" for ourselves and when they are destroyed or threatened we begin to feel resentment, anger, disappointment and other negative emotions.
Expectations are one of the pitfalls that sabotage us every day in achieving the goal of managing our emotions.
I am not talking about common sense expectations as it could be normal to expect that on day X they will pay the salary because it has been agreed, none of this. I'm talking about the expectations we tend to create in our minds about how things should go, how people should behave, how the day should go and things like that. This sabotages our emotions a lot as we create a "stencil" of how things must go and therefore we are rigid or hard towards anything that does not go according to our canons.
I leave you an in-depth article on expectations , if you want to check it out in case you think it might be your case.
Breathing also plays a fundamental role in managing emotions as, depending on how it is at a given moment, we can have one reaction rather than another.
Surely remember, if you have had similar experiences, where the person close to us says: Breathe! Take it easy!
Well, even if it doesn't just apply in these kinds of situations, it really works.
My advice is to practice meditation or breathing exercises, this is because the benefits are so many. 15 minutes a day of meditation would be enough to notice incredible changes in our days and in the management of our emotions.
Now this is a practice that also important corporations adopt in order to increase performance in daily life and at work.
I leave you here a video found online of an 8-minute basic meditation, to conclude this last paragraph.