I feel like saying that it is a journey that actually never ends , because as we go into working on ourselves we always discover some dynamics that are worth continuing to work on.
In this article we will try to analyze what it means to work on yourself and what it really entails, let me briefly tell you about my experience, I believe that the example is the best way to convey something.
When I started working on myself I didn't really know what I was doing (it seems strange but it was so), I was simply driven by a great desire to discover new things, understand myself better and maybe give clear answers to all the questions that passed me through. the head . Who I am? What is my purpose? What am I doing here?
Inside me I had a sort of "hole" at the pit of my stomach that I filled with useless things in order to fill it, that "hole" was responsible for many problems I have had in life, it was responsible for the fact that I always put on in situations that once undertaken I wondered when I would get out.
One day, I picked up a book that was Hellinger's "In Search of Lost Cuddles" (He talked about how people download certain dynamics onto / on their partner) and I began to understand how family dynamics worked from a psychological point of view and beyond . I was attracted by the title because I believe I was premature in some passages of my childhood, I was missing "a piece" according to my self-analysis and this led me to behave in a certain way in relationships.
I didn't have a goal, that book seemed to speak to me, it gave me a different perspective than I thought. In fact, reading it opened my eyes and from there my journey of inner work began.
Sometimes working on oneself comes at the exact moment it needs to come and in unexpected ways , it's not always done consciously. Many times it happens by chance, out of curiosity or maybe because it just has to happen, but it happens.
From then on I had already changed and so I started with the second book, the third, the fourth ... After a year I no longer lived even in the same state and now after 6 years I returned home as a new person and with 2 children . This search for myself had led me to change dozens of aspects of my life in a very short time.
In the journey that involved my move, I met several people who seemed to be there specifically for my inner evolution, they were there to help me fill that hole that I had now for almost 30 years. I didn't know it but they would really change my life.
Where had my research led me? What happened? From reading a series of books to completely changing positively and freeing myself from those mental limitations that I continually set myself without realizing it?
I didn't know I had all those blocks; until recently, everything I thought or felt seemed authentic to me. But I didn't know that everything had a reason to be there. I used to think I was my thoughts . I did not understand that I was much more, as are you who are reading right now. A nice sentence I read was really dry and direct (I love direct things):
Nice sentence, but as I was, the first thing I thought was: Ah so what would I be? I found the answer not long after.
In this journey of inner change I had the opportunity to fill that sensation fixed in the pit of my stomach, the most incredible thing was:
The chat took place with a person about twenty years older than me who looks a bit like Aladdin but an ultra happy version and with about thirty kg more. It looks like happiness in person, a smile always printed on the face and walking light as few in the paths of life.
We chatted for 30 minutes as soon as I met him. But the change had happened in the first 10 minutes.
He was able in a very short time to understand that I had that inner hole due to resentment towards my parents. I mean, I was convinced that I was at peace with them, but in reality I was not. When he made me think about this for me it was like a twinkle in my mind and magically the block was gone, I couldn't understand it but it was so. I immediately felt light.
That meeting was the beginning of an in-depth study of inner work, where each day of the week was partly dedicated to that.
The main thing I had gleaned from that experience was forgiveness, true forgiveness. I don't mean just saying: I forgive you, but releasing those sediments that remain inside us every time they harm us and every time we do the same to others (we must also forgive ourselves). Those remnants that we do not realize are there because we are taken by the vicissitudes of today's life that tend to continually distract us. I began to understand how to do it and the mechanism, I studied only that for 6 whole months. At the end of these six months, I was as light as ever. I couldn't believe it as I felt different.
I had an example of an "old school" entrepreneur, my father was a salesman at a young age, and he was also good. He raised me with that disposition to go and get my due and I thank him for it, in the end it was a great lesson to live in society. In fact, if I was traveling the new route it was also thanks to this, I was able to move thanks to the skills learned from him. Sell. But I didn't understand how this also distracted me from actually living. Because I was always worried about something, as soon as I saw my finances affected I went on a rampage. I began to struggle viscerally and this caused me a great internal pain. In fact, the lesson I learned was the following.
In fact, shortly after I landed in Spain I had a financial crisis, where everything I had built had fallen apart. And I found myself on the ground. The little man who looked like Alladin taught me that I shouldn't fret. I didn't understand why initially, but a short time later I was able to make sense of what he was saying to me. He said to me calmly and always with that smile on his face:
-Have faith! Man is always faced with a challenge that he can face.
In reality I only understood afterwards that by continuing in my attitude of lack I would only create further lack and that I would not come to change my situation in that emotional state. I also found this confirmation in the classic best sellers such as the law of attraction (which everyone thinks is only used to make money and abundance) and in a very interesting documentary on the GAIA platform.
In short, in a certain sense, whenever I acted on impulse and I was constantly nervous instead of "centering" on my current status, I tried to go crazy looking for solutions compulsively and therefore I was co-creator in lengthening those situations. But I was also co-creator in creating them! How did I create them? Simple! Through the fear of losing what I had.
As I said above, I created the situation of losing what I had, through fear . In reality the fear meant that I could not act for something bigger in my life. Fear held me in a "keep what you have for a long time" status; instead of allowing me to go further and act as if I had faith that what I had was mine and that no one could take it from me.
This was a very strong step in my inner work. But I realized that: The relationships, the opportunities, the abundance with ups and downs lost during my life I made them possible. All by himself. I also understand that financial ups and downs can be accepted as "a part of the game" something that just happens, but every time it happens it leaves you with a new lesson to treasure.
In the vision that I had assimilated I understood that money came and went, as in the usual phrase: "money comes and goes", only I did not understand that these are paper , which can do a lot of good, but also a lot of harm. Let's understand: Money is beautiful because it takes away a lot of "problems" but are we sure that what we call "problems" are not actually experiences that we simply have to live to learn something more? I don't want to talk exactly about destiny, let's talk about:
We are here to learn something greater.
This is the right focus for self-work . Not because I say it, but because this is really the case for many people who continuously work on their person, on their way of thinking, on their habits, on the way of speaking, on the way of perceiving or feeling ... This is it. If you too seek your path, sooner or later you too will reach this conclusion. Maybe you would use different words, but if we had a coffee together, we will understand that we are talking about the same thing. I say this because I have a "spiritual sister" with whom these linguistic misunderstandings often happen to me, for which we then spend an hour thinking about the things we meant to be the same (I don't say sister because I'm religious, I say sister because I just call her sister). The benefits of thinking this is that it keeps us alert to what happens over the years, it helps us to maintain a mindset of personal improvement.
The question is legitimate: What is this greater something that we should learn?
The truth is that I firmly believe that every soul has its own "personal lesson" to learn. But one thing is sure, if we resist this improvement process we will miss the opportunity to live a truly happy life. Those who tend to fossilize always keep repeating the same experiences , as if they were in a continuous cycle where the same things always happen. Things that even if you act in one way or another do not change and continue to happen again and you do not understand why. The reason is precisely this, learn the lesson that these events want you to understand. The solution is always inside, never outside.
When you change, events will change too. The solution is always inside, never outside.
I want to repeat that I am not religious, this is because religion itself does not exist, they created it and not with pure purposes. So when I talk about having faith, I am talking about belief. But having grown up in a Christian context that word enhances expression in me. I feel it inside. I also often use phrases from the bible, but I do this because I believe that there is a guide to life in there if read with the spiritual eyes and not with the eyes of someone subject to fear. Returning to faith, having firm faith means that he must be adamant. I understood this thanks to a phrase that opened up a world to me that was read right in the bible (in addition to the dear "Alladin" who always repeated it).
If you had faith as much as a mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, "Get upset and go plant yourself in the sea," and it would obey you.
Yes, it is a sentence from the Bible. Although I still can't get mulberry trees to commit suicide , I have learned that behind the fears there are the "blessings" or those experiences that really help you to work on yourself. Those experiences with which we tend to create a lot of excuses, where we try to rationalize so much that we abandon them.
Let me say that very often this attitude is simply denying oneself an experience, self-boycotting. This does not mean that you have to take whatever is on your mind and do it. It means that if it comes from within, from our soul or from our sixth sense we must do it without fear. With extreme faith, however, that is the experience that awaits us. But be careful, I said soul not heart, because I also learned that many times we do not distinguish the message from where it comes and that the heart can deceive us, as can the mind.
Maybe it's too much to tell you these things one after the other, but maybe not. I'm trying. They are difficult to assimilate, it takes years of research to reach these conclusions. Well ...
When I hear: "Listen to your heart", I totally disagree with the definition, although I know that actually people mean: -Listen to your soul.
The heart is as deceptive as the mind. The heart is part of a rational and totally impulsive zero part (it puts us in trouble), the mind, on the other hand, is part of a totally rational part but works like a computer (Sometimes it crosses data and gives answers that do not take into account many factors stimulating internal responses: fears, doubts, mental films). So where do we get these directions from? From the spirit, it is unique and authentic, it will help you work on yourself and will accompany you automatically on your path of evolution.
Surely you are wondering how to understand if the message is the right one. You won't like the answer. If you really listen to yourself, you will understand that it is the spirit. There are things you can't stop, if you stop them then they won't leave you alone. But not only rationally because they will constantly buzz in your head, but you will also perceive them on a physical level. You feel them, but you really feel them.
Many arrived at this point would ask: - Who is this spirit?
It is you
I think I have left in this article a consistent hint of what for me was "the work on oneself". Obviously there would be many things to add, to deepen and explain, but an article would not be enough. Keep following us and like us on Facebook if you liked the article.
Good work on you.